By Abimbola Ologun
Mrs. Gold Adeoye, a popular TV Host, counselor and a Pastor in the Redeemed Christian Church of God, has urged every husband who is presently jobless not be too comfortable with his wife being the breadwinner of the family, stressing that marriage was never designed to be like that.
Speaking on her programme, ‘Living Couple’ on Dove Television, Gold advised men not to allow their circumstances to rob them of their self-esteem or principles, even if it they are unable to provide for their families temporarily.
While responding to a question during the programme on Sunday, She encouraged husbands who have lost their jobs and now face the arduous challenge of financial hardships to confront their difficulties head-on with steadfastness and determination.
The wise words of the counselor, resonating with honesty and empathy, captured the attention of viewers as he delved into the importance of dignity and character, even in moments of struggle.
The beautiful and eloquent psychologist shared a remarkable story that shed light on the virtue of dignity. She emphasized that a man’s self-worth is his most valuable asset, even in times of financial difficulty. As she shared the story of a man who lost his job but refused to give up, she revealed how he consistently borrowed money from his wife and kept his promise to repay her, treating it as a loan. His unwavering integrity paid off when, while navigating the streets of Lagos, he crossed paths with an old friend who offered him a lucrative job.
Pastor Adeoye also struck a chord of caution to men who may have grown complacent in their role as providers, emphasizing that a marriage where a wife is the primary breadwinner deviates from God’s design. Citing the Bible as her source of truth, she quoted 1 Timothy 5:8, which emphasizes that any man who fails to support his own household has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.
In Pastor Adeoye’s words: “Don’t be too comfortable with your wife being the breadwinner of the family, marriage was never designed to be like that. The Bible says a man who cannot provide for his family is worse than an infidel. We are not the writer of the Bible, this is what the word of God said.
“If you want God to look at you as a real man, I want to beg you, no matter how small, feed your family, provide for them, let God see you are trying rather than staying at home and not doing anything.
“This is the best time to communicate your inadequacies to your wife, don’t react like “can’t you see I don’t have” you are going to hurt your wife the more.
“As a man don’t say because you don’t have a job, then you lose your self-esteem, carry yourself well. Tell “her babe don’t worry I don’t have a job oo but am still your husband. Don’t worry, I will be fine.”
Pastor Adeoye pointedly addressed the women whose husbands were unemployed, warning them against nagging their husbands for money. With insight and empathy, she underscored the futility of expecting money from a man without means, encouraging them to redirect their energy towards assisting their husbands in finding employment. The pastor’s message resonated with compassion and wisdom, serving as a beacon of hope to couples facing economic hardships.
She stated: “It will be a waste of time for you to ask a man who doesn’t have a job for money. You should focus on how this man can get a job rather than asking for money because the man has rightly told you. A man that doesn’t have a job, no matter how many times you ask, he will still tell you he doesn’t have.
“The question is what effort have you put into letting this man get a job and this also an opportunity to tell men out there that your husband needs a job.
“In summary, you as a wife start letting your husband see how you can help him get a job, and as a husband don’t sit down and become lazy because you don’t have a job. And don’t lose your self-esteem as a man keep believing and keep praying to God. As your wife is looking for job, you too keep looking for job and in no time God will sort your family out.”
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